The preview had me so skeptical about what I was about to watch. I will say though, that pretty actress caught my attention but after listening to her talk for a few moments, I became really concerned that this show was going to turn into a complete mockery of the BDSM community.

So was it a complete mockery of the BDSM community? My answer is, sort of.

*****Spoilers ahead*****

They did a semi-good thing for trying to make sex work look slightly glamorous. Here is a strong female lead in a Dominatrix role doing what she needs to do to put herself through school. Ok, cool I can follow that, I guess. She doesn’t seem to have kinky relationships outside of her work, but she at least appears to be good at her job. Secondarily we have a red-headed shy gay male lead who is broke and pretty darn adorably innocent in the sex department it seems. Ok, I both love him and can’t wait for him to blossom because, well, you know he will.

What I have qualms with is the way kinksters seeking services from Mistress May are portrayed. They are painted as absolutely ridiculous humans and are written to be laughed at. This does nothing except perpetuate the shame and embarassment associated with people wanting/needing experiences that don’t fit the “normal socieital mold”.

They romanticize the position of the Dominatrix and her assistant while turning our service seeking kinksters into jokes. There is little to no education for the vanilla world about the services which turns their very private fantasies into hilarity.

​There is a particular scene that completely breaks my heart. Her live-in submissive who serves her all day every day approaches her in the outside world while she is on a date with someone she withheld her secret profession from. He professes his undying love and service to her and she shuts him down and casts him aside. IT BROKE MY HEART! As a submissive myself, if my Dom (Paid or not) did this to me, it would be completely devastating.

​Our service is our love language. With every single act, we are giving our Dom’s a piece of our heart. To have it dismissed and cast aside…..DEVASTATING. I was livid at this moment while my vanilla friends watched and couldn’t possibly understand the underlining tones here. I’m sure it was missed by most people watching it.

Sure, he’s paying for the relationship, but I don’t think that changes how that particular character feels for her. They may have some unspoken agreement about these sorts of things and certainly if he were breaking some type of agreement by approaching her in public (he should be punished for it) but that was not what this scene was portraying. It was deliberately showing her being embrassed by her job and pushing him aside all for the sake of saving face. Ouch!

But enough on that….as I could keep going deeper into what that scene meant, but I’ll stop there because the point of this scene was for her to be forced to admit what she does for a living.

I tried not to cringe during the golden shower scene but I thouroughly enjoyed the outfits (so kudos to the costume designer). I will probably never think of the Happy Birthday song the same way ever again. I also tried not to critique the rope tying scene as her technique was sloppy at best. It always makes me wonder if they have someone who is actually a part of the BDSM scene to consult on these scenes. If not, why? I think some of us would do it for free just to get an accurate depiction of reality.

I enjoyed this MORE than say 50 Shades of Grey. However, the series has more work to do if it’s going to give a realistic portrayal of sex work, the bdsm community and NOT shame folks who are into things like piss play, humiliation or a variety of other kinks I’m sure they are going to introduce in upcoming seasons (should it be renewed).

It’s worth a watch if you want something entertaining to laugh at and enjoy a nice character arch for the two leads. You’ll get the warm fuzzines seeing each of them come into their own. If you’re looking for accurate portrayal of kink and not occassionaly yell at your television, maybe skip this one.

If Netflix would like someone to consult on future episodes, I’d gladly do it myself or recommend folks who can help as well.